Why You Should See the "Ghost Rider" Sequel...No Matter How Bad It Is

Oh dear sweet lord, he’s back again…

Nicolas Cage returns as Johnny Blaze in “Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance”, a sequel to the 2007 film adaptation of the cult classic Marvel comic character…and sadly there’s nothing we can do about it.

First of all, let me start by saying that as a character, Ghost Rider hasn’t really had that great a track record. Since the debut of the Blaze character in the 70s, he’s had his share of bumbling writers and creative teams that managed to frequently put the character into one convoluted mess time and time again. The only reason that Ghost Rider managed to stay somewhat popular over the years is the fact that he’s, to put it bluntly, a cool-looking character. I mean come on, what’s not to dig about a guy who sold his soul to the devil and has a flaming skull for a head and a motorcycle from Hell?

Anyway, with all that in mind, seeing a big-screen film adaptation featuring a character with such a checkered and convoluted history was far from a sure thing, let alone with Nicolas “I’m bat-shit crazy” Cage in the role…yet in 2007; the film was a surprisingly big hit. A big hit yes, but what rhymes with hit folks? That’s right, shit. And that’s what the Ghost Rider movie wound up being: a big flaming pile of shit.

Now here we are five years later, with Cage back in the role and the directing duo of Neveldine/Taylor (“Crank”, “Gamer”) behind the camera. With that pair, you’d figure that we’d get a ridiculously over-the-top action feast for the eyes that defies all logic and winds up being gleefully fun and violent. Well, from what early screenings are suggesting, that’s not what we’re going to get folks…

…we may get something worse this time around compared to last time, and that may be something of an accomplishment in itself.

Now I’m all for over-the-top genre flicks that revel in their badness, and while the idea of seeing the chain-wielding demonic biker taking a flame-fueled piss on the big-screen is kind of enticing to a degree, you can’t think that this flick won’t be anything BUT bad. Still, I’m predicting that “Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance” is so extreme in its bad-itude that it automatically becomes worth seeing at least once just in an attempt to digest how horrible it is. Hell, a couple years down the line there may be a drinking game based on it; yes folks, it could indeed be THAT bad.

Now I’m writing this blog on the sure-to-be-shitty Ghost Rider sequel just based on the fact that the character does an endearing place in my heart as a comic book geek, but I’m also choosing to write this based on the fact that we could all be about to bear witness to the most gleefully bad comic book movie since “Batman & Robin”…so in a way, we’re all about to be witnesses to history.

Really bad history.

REALLY REALLY bad history…the kind that deserves a commentary by the Mystery Science Theater 3000 crew.

Rebooting the DC Universe...and it fucking blows.

It was announced today, to the surprise of relatively no one within the comic book world, that DC will be doing an industry-wide reboot of their universe and most of their respective characters. This is something that many fanboys (myself included) figured would happen sometime soon (it wasn’t that long ago that Wonder Woman got a quick redux with a new costume, identity, and overall backstory) and now here we are. But why though? Why must we go through yet another re-imagining of our favorite iconic characters?

To coincide with the release of the final issue of “Flashpoint” (the current summer mega-event that promises reality changing events in the DC universe), things are changing big time for Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, The Flash, and the rest of the costumed pricks that populate the DC world. Why you ask? That’s a good question…so let’s take a look back at some of the previous “universe shattering” events that DC was behind.

In 1985, DC Comics released the 12-issue maxi-series “Crisis on Infinite Earths”, which was pretty much the first true publisher-wide “reboot” in comic book history. “CoIE” merged all of the multiple universes and versions of characters into one universe in an effort to condense and streamline their many properties to draw in new readers without confusing the ever-loving shit out of them, and for the most part, it worked. Instead of there being multiple Superman’s and Batman’s populating different Earths with differing back stories and such, we now had one of each, and it made things so much better in the long run.

Fast forward to 2005/2006 with “Infinite Crisis”, another company-wide crossover event that DID NOT streamline anything in terms of continuity, but instead made it a little more confusing to outside readers by resurrecting old characters that bit the dust in “CoIE” as a sort of love letter to long time DC Comics readers. This worked for the most part as well, even though it reintroduced the ideas of alternate worlds and alternate takes on various characters.

Now, here we are in 2011, and I guess the brass at DC has decided that it’s time to say “fuck it” to everything again and try to start over fresh. I can understand the idea about trying to draw in new readers, but the fact of the matter is that DC is alienating their longtime readers in doing so. I myself have been much more a fan of DC’s stuff than Marvel’s for nearly a decade now, mostly due to the fact that Marvel has the habit of rebooting their characters every five years or so in an effort to keep them “hip” for new generation after new generation, ad-nauseum.

Yes, I will read “Flashpoint” when it comes out in trade form, only because I want to see how superhero writer extraordinaire Geoff Johns changes everything and attempts to wipe the slate clean. Personally, I only give it about another five years (at best) until the old continuity gets re-introduced and we start all over again. Maybe by that time I’ll be willing to give the DC superhero universe another shot…but until then I’ll be sticking with my indie and horror comics and give the douche bags in tights a long break.

See y’all in the funnybooks folks…maybe.

Superman Returns....again...

Only a couple weeks ago it was announced that British actor Henry Cavill (if you watched “The Tudors” on Showtime, he played Charles Brandon, and starred in an assortment of shitty direct to DVD horror movies as well) would be the next man to don the red and blue tights of Superman in the upcoming mega-budget reboot of the “Superman” film franchise. Yes folks, we’re getting another “Superman” reboot whether we want it or not, and it’s being brought to us by none other than director Zack Snyder, whose comic book adaptation credits include “300” and “Watchmen”. Do we really need another “Superman” movie? Well, believe it or not, maybe we do…

It was five years ago now (and it sure doesn’t feel like it was that long) that Warner Bros. had spent a quarter of a BILLION dollars on Bryan Singer’s “Superman Returns”, which for all intents and purposes, flopped in comparison to the studio’s hopes and projections. Reception was mixed at best, with some enjoying it and others pretty much slamming Singer for being two steps away from practically plagiarizing Richard Donner’s original “Superman” film. Though Singer intended to pay wondrous amounts of homage to Donner and the original film, the end result was a 2 ½ hour long snooze-fest which had almost zero action sequences and portrayed Superman as being a “super-stalker”, always seeing what Lois Lane is up to in her new life apart from him…and it actually got to be kind of fucking creepy! Not to mention the fact that evil genius Lex Luthor still can’t come up with a better scheme than land control and Supes and Lois have a super-powered son, and well…well, that was “Superman Returns” in a nutshell. I just saved you 2 ½ hours, so you’re welcome.

Anyway, fast forward to 2008. Christopher Nolan scores a massive hit with “The Dark Knight”, and was eventually appointed supervising producer of a new “Superman” movie by Warner Bros. and DC. Singer’s proposed sequel was scrapped, as well as the former cast and crew, in favor of what was then promised to be a “darker” take on the Man of Steel. That statement in itself kind of sets up a bit of a conundrum though: Superman isn’t a “dark” kind of character. He’s the big blue Boy Scout, and aside from being loved by kids, most comic fans look at him as being an uber-lame character with universe-shattering power. But that’s the problem with being the most recognizable and most celebrated comic book character of all time: he hasn’t changed. I’m not saying he should, but we as a society no longer identify with Superman. We’ve become more accustomed and comfortable with celebrating the anti-hero, that’s why Batman has always managed to stay so relevant for decades. Combine that with the popularity of “dark” comic book movie heroes like Wolverine, The Punisher, Blade, and the like; and it becomes incredibly hard to appreciate a character that is just concentrated awesome good.

With that in mind, Nolan brings in Snyder, whose last foray into comic book adaptations saw him make the unfilmable film that was “Watchmen”: the godfather of dark superhero comics. While that film’s reception was mixed as well, Nolan and the studio both hope that Snyder can put a bit of a darker turn on the Man of Steel, and I for one actually kind of want to see it. So far though, it has been revealed that General Zod will return as the main villain of the film. Zod was last played by the great Terrance Stamp in “Superman II” way back in the day, and was awesome as well. Do we really need to see Zod again? I can understand Luthor being a recurring villain, but Zod again? If they want to put a darker spin on Superman, why not used some his darkest villains? What about Brainiac, the villain who had the biggest impact on Superman’s mythology other than Luthor? Or Darkseid, who for all intents and purposes is a God of death? Hell, even Doomsday, the monster that killed Superman in the comics; why not any of them instead of doing Zod over again?

*Sigh*

Believe it or not, even though I’m spouting off all this Superman knowledge, I’m not even a real fan of the character. When I was a kid it was a different story of course, and even today, you can’t pick up a single DC comic and not somehow find him in it somewhere. But that’s okay regardless; he’s just that iconic a character. Everyone knows who Superman is, and everyone knows his backstory…and they know it all whether they want to or not!

He’s that iconic that he deserves another cinematic shot…but if it fails again well…

it may prove that box office busts are so strong that even Superman can’t beat ‘em.

The Green Lantern Trailer: First Impressions

As a life-long comic book geek who has always had a soft spot for Green Lantern, seeing an epic, big-budget move adaptation is something that I thought I would never, ever see happen. Directed by Martin Campbell (Casino Royale, The Mask of Zorro) and also featuring touches from long-running comic writer Geoff Johns (who practically single-handedly re-established the Green Lantern's place and mythos in the DC universe), this Green Lantern movie appears to have so much going for it...

...on paper at least.

First off, and this is pretty much just me having an epic nerd moment here, but Ryan Reynolds? Seriously? I understand that people love him and he has the steroid/superhero physique, but really? He's playing Hal Jordan, the test pilot who is chosen to be the first human Green Lantern, a job and title that for all intents and purposes is pretty much a space-cop. The Hal Jordan portrayed in the comics for years is one who is a flat-out womanizer and overall badass with absolutely no fear. When I see Ryan Reynolds, I just don't see those qualities. Instead, I see a smirking, one-liner cracking actor that just doesn't come off as being an ultimate kind of badass.

But hey, back in 2007 I thought casting Heath Ledger as the Joker was a bad call, so what do I know really in terms of casting?

Anyway, the rest of the trailer offers quick glimpses at Hal's love interest Carol Ferris played by some chick named Blake Lively, who just comes off as being too young comapred to Reynolds, and in all honesty sounds like she's reading her lines off a cue card. There are also very quick glimpses of the villains Hal will be taking on, including arch-nemesis Sinestro (Mark Strong, aka the mob dude from "Kick-Ass") and the mutating Hector Hammond (Peter Sarsgaard) as well as what I think is Hal's alien ally Kilowog. I'd be lying if I said that these aspects of the film didn't look the least bit promising.

One last thing to mention though: the costume. Now I understand the notion that Hal's costume is powered by the ring, and instead of giving Ryan Reynolds the traditional superhero ready-to-wear costume/suit, motion capture CGI is used instead. In some instances in the trailer, it looks kind of cool, but in others (such as Hal powering up in front of his pal) it looks ridiculously fake and lame.

All I know is that come June 17th 2011, there will be a Green Lantern movie, and we'll all know whether or not it's good, or if it's pure shit...and in the long run we'll know if DC-related films can rival what Marvel has done with their films and properties over the past couple years.

Comics That Deserve Your Time & Attention, Part 1

Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I'm a comic book geek. Always have been, probably always will be. Keep in mind however that by the term "comic book", I'm not necessarily talking about superheroes.

Superheroes have for the most part dominated the medium since its inception, and for the most part continue to do so today. What gets lost in the middle of it all however is the fact that there are so many intelligently written and incredibly compelling comic works out there that garner little to no attention, which in itself is a crying shame.

This first segment of this blog will focus on a collection of titles that deserve your time and attention, and will make you forget that comic books are loaded with nothing but spandex-clad people...



THE WALKING DEAD
Image Comics
Writer: Robert Kirkman
Artists: Charlie Adlard & Cliff Rathburn

An ongoing series of zombie survival horror, Robert Kirkman's "The Walking Dead" is every zombie fan's dream comic come true. Main protagonist Rick is a cop who wakes up out of a coma to find that the world he knew is now overrun by a zombie apocalypse. As he scrambles to find his missing family, Rick soon learns that the worst thing about this zombie-filled world isn't necessarily the zombies themselves, but the human survivors who haven't quite coped too well in this new world. Horrific and gripping, "The Walking Dead" became a smash for Image Comics, so much so that AMC has been prepping a live-action prime-time TV adaptation set to premiere in October.



JOHN CONSTANTINE: HELLBLAZER
DC/Vertigo Comics
Various writers & artists

Forget that lame "Constantine" flick from a few years back with Keanu Reeves. The real John Constantine that we know and love is a blonde, British, chain-smoking, bad ass master of black magic and bad luck. Over the years that "Hellblazer" has had various revolving creative teams, the best that stand out are the titles written by Garth Ennis, whose deconstruction and rebuilding of Constantine rank among the pivotal chapters of the character. And speaking of Garth Ennis...



PREACHER
DC/Vertigo Comics
Writer: Garth Ennis
Artist: Steve Dillon

An ongoing series that ran into the late 90s, mad Irishman writer Ennis' title ranks among the most prolific in Vertigo's stable. "Preacher" revolves around the ass-kicking Jesse Custer: a reverend who smokes, drinks, screws, and swears probably much more than he should. By the time we get to Jesse's origin however, you'll have quite the understanding why. Oh yeah, he also has the power to issue a command at anyone to make them do whatever he wants; which comes in pretty handy as he, his gun-toting girlfriend Tulip, and the Irish vampire Cassidy traverse America's heartland on a search to make God answer for what he has stricken upon mankind...all the while as they avoid government agents, religious cults, and a decent abundance of perverts. Laced with pitch-black humor and straight-out horror, "Preacher" remains a comic geek favorite to this day.



THE NIGHTLY NEWS
Image Comics
Writer/Artist: Jonathan Hickman

What happens when those brainwashed by the biased and corporate-controlled American media strike back at it? Nothing good for anyone involved that's for sure. Graphic designer Jonathan Hickman lends a unique art style on top of a conspiracy-laden story of a group of people that have been brought together to fight back. "The Nightly News" is definitely something that isn't for all tastes, but it is something that is shockingly introspective while at the same time equally mind-blowing.


That's all for now folks, but there will be more to follow soon...